Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Understanding our Parents




I grew up in a family where I can play with my brother and sister every time. My father used to tell me bedtime stories. My mother took charge of checking my assignments and correcting my mistakes. All of them contributed much to make my childhood years a memorable one. I have a very supporting family and a home where I can never be unwanted.

As I grow, I slowly realized the bigger picture of life. I encountered a diverse reality - different people, struggles and achievements. My childhood years began to change. There are no more playtime, bed stories, and assignments to be checked by my mother. I belong now to the decision-making community. 


Yes, I can decide on my own but this is the stage where I often encounter problems. When I have something to do with my classmates, we usually do the activities away from home. And what usually happens, I come home late. My parents then start to scold me for not respecting the house rules, or other instances like spending too much time in leisure, bonding time with my classmates than staying at home. Sometimes when I want to visit some friends during night-time, they don’t allow me to go with them and punish me for not obeying their decisions. It seems that I don’t have freedom. I feel unloved and disrespected. I don’t get what I wanted. This leads me to rebellion.

Nonetheless, as a philosopher, it is my task to unravel the ‘mystery’ of the family. It is my job to comprehend the situation I have with my parents. I am their child and I am their responsibility. Whatever happens to me disturbs them. I exist because two persons offered themselves to each other – an expression of their mutual surrender. I am the significant unfolding and blossoming of the unity of love of my parents. My existence is the meaning of their existence.


As their child, I have my role in the welfare of the family. I have my responsibility in keeping the family united. The moment I was born, I became their life. My existence brings forth their meaningful existence. My life is also their life.

Now that I realized the situation, I can now take part without hesitation to contribute for the sake of the family. Their intention when they don’t allow me to go outside during night-time is their expression of love for me. Their actions remind me that I am their responsibility. And most of all, since I am their life, without me in their side, life seems worthless to them. 

A ‘mystery’ indeed.



Sem. Dennis Rey Ortojan is a 2nd Year Theologian from the Diocese of Tandag. He is currently enrolled at the UST Faculty of Sacred Theology. He is also the Secretary for External Affairs of the UST Central Seminary. This article was first posted in his Facebook account last January 13, 2011.  


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